Marriage

A transcript of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Facebook Group discussion on conflict in relationships.

The transcript of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's discussion about partnership in marriage with Monica Packer of the About Progress podcast and Dr. Julie Hanks.

I think a lot about sex—-although maybe not in the way that some people do. In particular, I think a lot about why people like and don’t like to have sex, what ignites desire and what suffocates it. As a therapist, I meet with people almost daily who are trying to figure out why they don’t like to have sex, why their spouse doesn’t like to have sex, or why their spouse does like to have it. It is an elusive question sometimes as well as a painful one for many couples.   My dissertation research focused on the question of Mormon women’s sexual agency. That is, Mormon women’s capacity to be acto...

Monica Packer: I'm so honored to have Jennifer back. If you don't know her, well, hang tight. You're going to have your mind blown so much. This is who Jennifer is.  Dr. Finlayson-Fife: I'm Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife. I am a psychotherapist that works primarily with couples and individuals around relationship and sexuality issues. I also do a lot of teaching, both online courses and also in workshops around the country. I also do a lot of podcasting and public speaking.  Monica Packer: And my version of your intro is that you changed my life and I think you've changed thousands of...

Cameron Wright: This is Cameron Wright, and I'm the author of The Orphan Keeper. So listeners understand, let me set the scene up for you. The Orphan Keeper is the story of Tag Roeland. Now, Tag was a little boy in India who came from a very poor family. They were living in a thatched hut with a dirt floor and he was always running off getting into trouble and despite his circumstances-- sometimes going hungry, he thought life was actually pretty good. Except then when he was about seven, he was kidnaped. He was sold to an orphanage and then adopted to a family in Utah who thought that he was ...

We are, from birth, sensual creatures, but a lot of us feel like that’s a design flaw - like something’s wrong, as opposed to that being what it is to be human. How much can we really embrace that core sensuality, and how much do we shame it and try to get away from it?

"When the wedding celebration and honeymoon end and we are left to work out a life with another flawed human being, we are often unprepared for the disharmony experienced in those early days. When so many of us anticipate bliss in marriage, what do we do when we find ourselves confronting disappointment and conflict? What meaning should we make of the discord, and what can we do to make our marriage better?"